This semester I am taking all 3 core classes required for my minor: Comparative Agriculture (AEB 3671), International Development Policy (AEB 4283), and International Humanitarian Assistance (AEB 4282). At the beginning of the semester, my professor for my policy class sent out a notification saying this will be an incredibly difficult class. At first, this gave me a lot of anxiety. However, as the class went along I felt comfortable.
Then the first exam came. I studied hard, or what I thought was studying hard for this class. I read my class notes over and over again, did practice exams, the study guide, and went through each slide show presentation. However, I did not perform well on the exam. I still feel the blood draining from my face even now writing this post. I had a passing grade, but it was not sufficient for me. I am someone who strives to be the best version of me, and my exam grade did not represent it at all. Additionally, there are not many grades in the class, so every point matters.
I learned the difference between thinking you know something through recall versus actually knowing something. I am taking what I learned and applying it for studying for the final, potentially my saving grace. Additionally, I plan on spending a minimum of 3 days to study the material because the material is incredibly challenging.
Failure gives me anxiety, I absolutely hate it. However, I know it is part of life. Therefore, I try my best to make something negative into something positive. I know my potential. Once I set a goal, I am determined to meet it. For example, the last core business course is MAN 4504. A challenging, engineering-like class with a lot of math. I was determined to earn an "A". I spent time studying. through the entire Summer C of 2019; I earned that "A". When I did fail this past semester, I normally shut down for a few hours. I hermit in my apartment and binge watch some shows. Then after feeling bad about myself, I pick myself back up, workout, and tell myself it is okay and just to do better next time. Honestly, this class has not taught me much about failure. It highlighted that failure will happen and that is okay, but it has not changed my perception on it. I mentioned in a previous post that I have spent a large chunk of time devoted to growing as a person. It was during this time that I really learned that failure is okay, that is okay to feel upset about it, but it is what you do after failure that matters.
Hi Meg,
ReplyDeleteI am the same way, I hate failing. I too turn into a quiet hermit when I fail, the only difference is it seems harder for me to pull myself out of the slump. I think you chose an excellent example to write about, I considered writing about a class I struggled with as well. I admire your honesty with saying that you really haven't learned anything new about failure. I think you aced this assignment, keep it up!
Hey Meg! I could not agree wit you more. Failure truly sucks but we must learn from it. Thank you for sharing this and being transparent. I can relate to you tremendously. I remember taking my first business course here on campus and earning a C on the exam. I personally believe that anything lower than a B is failing, so I felt very sad at the time. Now I think about grades as something that is impactful but not as impactful as the experiences we make. For my major, employers do not view GPA's but if I were you I wouldn't take any low grade as failure I would take it as a learning opportunity to understand that a low GPA is not the end of the world. Simply do the best you can, reach out for guidance and keep above a 3.0!
ReplyDeleteHi Megan,
ReplyDeleteI understand what you feel, I don't like to feel mediocre with myself and what I could actually offer. If I had studied for a long time and had only a passing grade, I would be pissed. But as you said, is part of life so we better take the best out of our failures and keep going. Keep doing your best! those are the best kind of people.
Hi Megan,
ReplyDeleteI exactly know what you're going through. I faced the same situation last semester. I was taking 3 core classes and they were very hard. Even though I studied a lot for the first tests, I did not achieve my desired grades. It was very disappointing for me. Regarding what you do when you fail, I do the same thing. I just isolate and just want to be alone. However, I eventually overcome my failures just like you do! Failure is part of life and it eventually makes us better!